Dating online as a Christian can feel daunting and overwhelming. As a therapist, I have heard many objections from clients when I suggest they consider online dating. Common comments include, “I don’t want to seem desperate,” “It’s a bunch of weird people,” and “I tried it once, and it wasn’t for me.” I listen attentively to their concerns and often ask a question they struggle to answer: “How do you intend to meet someone?” Occasionally, I might hear, “Maybe I will run into someone at the grocery store or coffee shop.” While nothing is impossible with God, we must also do our part. One significant barrier I’ve noticed is that many women feel ill-equipped and simply need some moral support. Therefore, I have compiled tips from clients who have been successful in online dating, and I am happy to share them with you.

Very Present Help Counseling, founded by Ebony Johnson, specializes in providing heartfelt and professional virtual Christian counseling. Based in the Nashville, TN, area. Our services extend remotely to anywhere in Florida and Tennessee. Schedule your virtual Christian counseling session today.

Be Open

Being open-minded is crucial in the world of online dating. It’s essential to recognize that this journey is not solely about finding a romantic partner; it’s an opportunity to embrace a variety of new experiences and adventures. Engaging with different people can push you beyond your usual boundaries, inviting you to explore unfamiliar aspects of yourself and the world around you. Step outside your comfort zone and discover the excitement that comes with meeting new individuals and forming meaningful connections.

Turn Off Notifications

Online dating can be overwhelming, but you can regain control by disabling notifications from dating apps. This helps establish healthier boundaries and reduces distractions. Choose specific times to check your messages—such as once in the morning and once in the evening. This way, you can stay engaged without feeling pressured to respond to every alert. When you do check in, make sure to fully engage in the process. Striking a balance will enhance your experience and help you make genuine connections.

Natural Profile

Present yourself with high-quality, natural-looking photos. That means skipping the lashes and full face of makeup. When you meet someone in person, you’ll make a lasting impression by looking even better than in your pictures. Include a photo of yourself engaging in your favorite activities, such as visiting a coffee shop; this demonstrates that you lead a vibrant life. If you feel like you lack interesting experiences, take the initiative to create some!

Be Picky

Be selective, but do so thoughtfully. Focus on shared interests rather than just appearances. I often tell my clients that if they were to rate looks on a scale of 1 to 10, with Michael B. Jordan as a 10, consider aiming for a 6. I know what you might be thinking—”no way!” But remember, online, all you see are pictures; you don’t get a sense of personality or charisma.

Instead of prioritizing appearance, look for common passions. For example, if someone is a pet lover and you’re not, it might be best to move on. Similarly, if a smoker comes into your life and you cannot accept that, prioritize your values and choose not to pursue the relationship. Always ask yourself, “How will this person enrich my life?”

Expand Your Dating Range

Don’t confine your dating options to just your neighborhood or city; take the opportunity to broaden your horizons by expanding your online dating range. This could open the door to new and exciting connections. Additionally, while traveling, immerse yourself in the online dating landscape of each new place you visit. You might discover intriguing profiles in cities you could envision moving to in the future, allowing you to explore relationships that could blossom beyond geographical boundaries.

Filter Quickly

It’s important not to cling to relationships that fail to foster personal growth or genuine companionship. If you begin to feel that a connection is stagnant or unreciprocated, it may be beneficial to reassess its value in your life. By cutting ties early when you sense that a relationship isn’t progressing, you can protect your emotional well-being and open up space for more meaningful connections in the future. Remember, nurturing relationships should contribute positively to your life, so don’t hesitate to let go of those that don’t serve that purpose.

Conclusion

Pray, pray, pray! Inviting God into your dating journey is essential, for He truly understands your heart’s desires. Your Father in Heaven knows what you need even before you ask Him, guiding you toward the right path and the right person (Matthew 6:8). Trust in His wisdom as you navigate this important phase of your life.

At Very Present Help Counseling by Ebony Johnson, we provide compassionate, faith-based virtual counseling services tailored for adults grappling with anxiety, depression, grief, loss, PTSD, and trauma. Our approach integrates spiritual care with professional counseling, offering a beacon of hope and a path toward healing.

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